Faith

This is my first blog, I find it so emo of me and then again I find it a nice escape to just be me. Maybe there is an inner emo in here somewhere. I enjoy writing and at times even consider myself a good writer. I love to read blogs, they are so insightful at times. I started this one for a reason unlike others I think. I started to share our "hopefully" baby journey. The funny thing is...there is no baby yet.



Scott and I officially started last month with no success. This month's trying is done and now it's a waiting game. Only this time I am starting to either experience things or I am making shit up and need to have my head checked. This morning I woke up with no sense of taste for my buttered Eggo's sprinkled with Cinnamon and sugar...one of my favorites and it mine as well have been water smothered with water. Then, about an hour later the taste of metal took over my mouth. I brushed, I popped mints and drank tons of water but it lingered until about 11:00 am. I Google everything, so of course I googled to see if these were signs of pregnancy. My search resulted in someone, somewhere, experiencing that at some point during a pregnancy but no true proof it was a sign of pregnancy.



I checked my boobs all day. Nothing so far. Everyone says that it is the tell tale sign. They look the same size, color and don't feel any different. Of course conception, if it did occur, happened within the week so I am sure it's too early to experience much.



Everyone says "It's in the Lord's hands" as if I don't know that or something. Then I start to freak out because what if HE thinks I am too busy right now to have a baby with my full time job and 5 college classes. Or what if HE thinks I don't have enough money for a kid right now or I am not going to church enough to be ready.



I am type A people! I chart my temperature, signs of fertility and every pill I put in my mouth in a computer program, so the fact that this is out of my control is getting to me a little. I hope HE blesses us very soon because I don't know if I could do this for months or years.



I want to blog once I am pregnant so I can share with everyone the journey that occurs over 9 months. I want to share in the ups and downs, the funnies and the tears, and most of all I just want to share this amazing experience with my friends and family.



So here is my official blog...hope you stay tuned to see what is to come.



Love...